There is an alarming trend going on in black America. I almost hate to admit this reality is even amongst us, but hey, some body has got 2 say it, so why not let it be me. If you are standing up, I suggest that you have a seat because this information just may be about you. It seems that its a bunch of people out here who are extremely
ghetto and they don't even know about it! I saw a crowd of young folk at McDonald's fighting over a McNugget-yes one nugget. The fight lasted about 20 minutes and a lot of people got hurt. Therefore, the blog had to be written. So to help you out, Wardy is gonna help you with some signs that you may be in the group! You might be ghetto if:
You put sugar on your frosted flakes
Your kids were in your wedding
You call your mama by her first name
You have a cell phone with no minutes- so you at the pay phone
You iron dirty clothes.
You've been a guest on Maury, or Jerry Springer.
You're nineteen and you just met your father.
You have a wife and kids but still live at home with your momma.
You chew ice.
You still wear anything that says "Whoop, there it is."
You have ever used terms such as "It's all good", "she's all that", "don't go there" etc.
Your mother did your hair in the kitchen.
You don't pay your rent until you get the three-day notice.
You put on panty-hose instead of shaving your legs.
You buy clothes for a party and return them to the store the next day.
Your first name begins with TA', La', or Sha'.
You took the batteries out of the smoke detector to put in your pager.
Your bank is a check-cashing place.
You have to put stuff on layway at the 99-cent store.
You think putting batteries in the refrigerator recharges them.
When you were little you had to be in the house before the streetlights came on.
You take bubble baths with diswashing liquid, shampoo, or liquid detergent.
You return gifts for money.
You save cooking grease.
The only dates marked on the calendar are the 1st and the 15th.
Your mama whipped you and your friends.
You keep food stamps in a money clip.
You wear tube socks with dress shoes.
You add water to shampoo to stretch it.
You put your kids to sleep with NyQuil or Dimetapp.
You use your welfare check as collateral.
You can read your haircut.
You bought your rims before you bought your car.
Your fingernails are longer than your fingers.
You think jury duty is a good way to make money.
You think going on a diet means no candy.
You have a drawer in your kitchen just for condiments from fast-food restaurants.
Turning up the heat means turning on a burner on the stove.
The batteries in your remote control are held with a piece of tape.
Something smells spoiled in the refrigerator, and all you do is change the box of Arm & Hammer Baking soda.
Your furniture is covered in plastic.
You run and get pots as soon as it rains.
The back of your toilet seat is always off.
You use vaseline for shoe polish.
You don't think you're clean unless there is visible baby powder on your neck and chest.
The heels on your feet look like you've been kicking flour.
You use black eye liner to line your lips.
You wear your shower cap everywhere but in the shower.
You've never been to the dentist.
You clean your ears with a bobby pin, key, or ink pen cap.
The only art you own is on your fingernails.
You never learned to swim because you couldn't get your hair wet.
Your child thinks his real name is "Lil' Man"
You have trouble spelling your children's names and you named them
You got angry when the government stopped the cheese program
You drive around on a donut, months after the flat happened.
There are more guest at the reception than at the wedding.
The majority of the flowers at the burial site are plastic and/or taken back the next day.
You take the bus to a club.
You ask perfect strangers to take a picture with you and tell people you dated them.
Your child drops his pacifier and you sanitize it by sucking on it.
You buy your stockings at the same place you do your grocery shopping.
You tell all your friends you are mixed with some other nationality, but the naps tell a different story.
You mixed up some kool-aid and realized you don't have sugar. Then you put the pitcher in the frige until you buy some.
If you ever use 'nem to describe a group of people (ex. Leroy and nem, or Jethro and nem)
You have relatives named Leroy and Jethro.
You ever left a social gathering with a plate.
You add "ED" or "T" to the end of words already in the past tense (ex. Tooked, Light-skinneded, kilt or killeded, ruint, )
You fell asleep in a chair so that you wouldn't mess up your new hairdo.
I am Ward.....
