More things that only black folk do.........

1. Play Jeezy, or any other ignorant music as loud as possible.
2. Dance.  We love to dance. We like dancing alone, with someone, or even as a large group.
3. Sing.  This lady at my job asked me if I could sing, I said, I can hold a note.  That was a blatant lie. When I’m at home, I sing J. Holiday at the top of my lungs.
4. Watch Twerk Team videos. 
5. Eat fried chicken. I don’t know why we keep hiding this stuff from white people, they be knowing; The Colonel and Popeye are both white!!!!
6. Google incoming numbers we don’t have in our phone.
7. Go on Twitter, Facebook or Gchat and talk about our coworkers.  Unless you work with all Black people, you have to resort to these options on the low to get out your thoughts.
8. Talk about how people stress us out, and how they don’t get it.
9. Play Spades and Bid Whist.  As a shorty, I had two telephone books, and a death threat on my head if I reneged.
10. Beat their kids like Zab Judah, something I don’t agree with.  Also, Black parents have this thing called the Angry Whisper — it’s basically when your mother sends you death threats through her teeth.
11. Stare at white people’s butts – both men and women do this.  Either they’re small or their big, either way we’re just wondering how is that attractive?
12. Argue.  We’re just a spirited bunch, we love each other.
13. Laugh.  My coworkers will never see me laugh, can’t let them ever think I enjoy working for the Man.
14. Locate, identify, but never alert the authorities.  Ashley: “There go the police.”Shaquitta: “WHERE?!”  Ashley: “You being mad obvious right now, don’t look.”
15. Talk funny. Trust me, that’s not our normal voice until we’re with our friends and the door is locked.
16. Throw away bills.  Sallie can kiss my black… moving right along.
17. Make personal phone calls on our work phone. And get mad when a colleague has the audacity to interrupt us with actual work.
18. Make up new code words and slang to use with our friends.  White people stole swag from us before we even got good at it.
19. Call their momma.
20. Put something unhealthy in our hair like pomade or a perm. I would like to say something about patting a weave or something, but according to sisters, “when your hair is itching, it’s itching, so we scratch whenever.”
21. Pretend like we’re playing a sport.  For example, balling up a piece of paper, tossing it in the trash, yelling, “LeBronnnnnnn!” and then walking back to your desk like we did something!
22. Complain about having to pay for parking at work and buy cheap work shirts!

I am Ward......