Why I don't loan $$$$$$

In the great words of Bill Cosby..."You don't loan money-U give it away! If the person/s pay you back, then it was a loan". I had to learn that the hard way. One time a so called friend asked me to loan him some $$$ until he got paid the following Friday. At the time I was living single and had a small house in South Bend. I had some change but my mortgage was coming up, but since this was my hommie, eye said what they hayzeee and flipped him the coins.
Well the next Friday came around and my hommie didn't. I called and stopped by 3 times. Finally I caught ole boi at the local 7 eleven playing a dang video game. I remember saying "Dude where is my money" and he replied "Dude you got money don't sweat me, I got bills of my own plus a kid". Eye was like what the......? I just stood there thinking should I chin check this dude and go to jail or cut his brake line of his hooptie and watch the evening news for any sudden deaths? I came to my senses and chalked it up to a learning lesson.
I understand that sometimes friends need a hand by come on son? When people ask me for a loan now, I kindly point them down to local cash advance place store. Did you know you can borrow up to $550 per two weeks now! I know right? Ya know what I see trending now? The people who ask to borrow money have new scams to get you leaning. They say they will double the amount back that you loan them, but get selective amnesia when its time to Annie up? What ever the case the game is the same. Game recognize Game.....Say brutha can Wardy borrow a.....nevermind I am on the way to the Loan Store....
I am Ward....

Love intervention......Part 1 ( the mild version)

1). “When we’re 2 gether , I am walking on clouds! I can’t wait 2 be with him again!”
Or
2). “We hardly have anything in common. Rather than marriage mates, we’re roommates. I feel so lonely!”
As you probably guessed, the 1st statement was made by a single girl and the 2nd by someone who is married. What you didn’t know was that the statements were made by the same woman at different points of the relationship!!!!
What happens in so many relationships today that causes us so much pain? Is it a shortage of good men? Do people follow the pattern left by their parents? Is change too much to ask for love? Obviously it is a case by case situation for most but for the purposes of this blog, I am gonna focus on women who want to be married and from my perspective why there are having such dating troubles.
From the jump I want to make clear 1 point that life has taught me again and again. “Life is precious and a gift that must not be wasted”. If you are in a relationship that is not fulfilling your needs and wants, you will behoove yourself to ask “Why am eye wasting my time, my life and my feelings on something that is causing me more harm than good?” Heck we all are guilty of it, especially me! The first step is identifying the problem so we then choose the appreciate solution. With that being said, peeps this!
How wonderful would it be if couples would ask each other and themselves, what do I want from my relationship, what can I give and how will I communicate this with my mate during good or challenging times. Quite often times I hear women say things like *all men are dogs *he just wants my cookies*he never listens or talks to me*he called me shallow, etc. I look at it like this. The person who complains is the person with the problem. If a man is all those things mentioned above, he must be comfortable in his skin and doesn’t want to change. It is hard enough to try and change our selves (look at all the failed diets and new years resolutions) let alone trying to change the dude yall with! Some women have a history of choosing the same type of dudes over and over and always end up crying talkin about why he do this to me again, while others don’t know their own self-worth and end up being helpers! Helpers are women who try to do everything for the man who is emotionally unavailable to them in some way. We can only get what we expect from others, so why not raise your expectations levels. We all know the women who chase the man for attention. He doesn’t show up or call you and begin to sweat him with all the calls about where he been and why he doesn’t love you? Some go as far as blaming the dude for her unhappiness. The great Kat Williams said, its called “Self Esteem not His- Esteem”. The problem begins when you try to build a relationship off of what could be rather than what it is in reality!
I clearly understand that many men don’t know how to be the man needed in good relationships, but the good woman can still play an important role, but that is another blog-lol! After speaking with a few of the hommies today, I realized that many women don’t even know what men really want and why some women get married while others who seem together are single 4 life! Here it is ladies.
Men want an intelligent compliment to help him achieve the family goals that he sets out. (He is the head so choose your man wisely), men want some1 beautiful from a spiritual and physical stand point. Men want someone who will fight with them and for them against the world. Men want an extension of themselves. The creator said he was going to make a helper for the man, so it can be done. Now a daze it seems women want to be the leader or co-head of the relationship and demand the dude she has do it her way instead of leaving (if not married) or helping the situation change for the better. I know couples need companionship, partnership and intimacy to be happy. Of course this takes time right? Some people swear they in love after 3 months and move in with a person and give their body and mind then wonder why he don’t want you no more. Break the freaking cycle already, Geesh! Successful couples learn undo what has not been working and fix things as they arise. We are constantly bombarded with movies and TV shows and books in which the girl finds the perfect guy and lives happily after. In reality we have dudes with pot bellies, bald heads and low tolerance for tears! The key is to remember the love endures all things (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)
I will end part one with this. If dating is like flying a kite, then marriage is like piloting a plane. The man and the woman have to more skill and effort to make it work. We can’t just rush into things, we can’t expect older relationships to be fixed overnight and we can’t do the same things of the past and expect a new result……
I am Ward……

Spent the wknd in Chicago......

Went to a wedding, saw my grand momz, my dad was there, all my cousins and me and my nephews kicked it and capped it off with me winning in bowling.....of course i had to win.
I am Ward.....

Why is love so hard.....

Last time I checked there were millions of books on love and happiness, yet the number of people choosing to stay single or get divorced is sky rocketing.I personally feel that the sexes don't know how to play their respective roles. Heck relationships are hard enough, Even though God is perfect... he choose to be a single parent and his son turned out pretty darn good if I say so! I know its hard to guard your heart and give what you think is needed from your mate, but still not giving everything you know you should.
Some couples think the other should be a freaking mind reader. "after all this time you should know this or that about me" while the other person i s thinking " You don't even freaking know your self, how the #(#*$#$@ am I suppose to know you????" Even with the best of couples, its hard to use logic during a heated argument because when emotions are high, reasoning tends to be low. I suggest envisioning your self in situations and you handling it well, and in time when the situation arises (and it will) then play the role you practiced. Of course, your mate can tick you off faster than anybody else because they know your weak points and what buttons to push.
I don't try and fool myself, I know we are in the last days of this world- so these things are 2 be expected. I firmly believe we all know what we need to do, its just that we are stubborn. I mean is it really that hard, to realize that we are either part of the problem or part of the solution? After all, the same things that bring couples together are the same things that break couples apart. Again the question is "Why is love so hard", I think we because we make it that way. Men and women have options like never before. Sex is everywhere along with willing partners. Trust is a thing of the past and mistakes are often the source of frustration for couples. Until we start to do these two things, you ain't got a chance.
Men: learn to love your woman as you love yourself and don't get overly angry with her. Tell her and show her how much you love her with words and actions.
Women:learn to have deep respect for your man. Don't talk bad about him in public or in front of the kids. Build him up to others and show him that you are a support not a hindrance.
I am Ward......

i discovered that single women know everthing about love

Is it me or does it seem like some of the greatest love experts are single (most often bitter) African American women? I really admire them and how they know everything that the male mind is thinking, why we do what we do and what we will do next! Its amazing how these women, with all this knowledge are some how single?
Of course I am just being ironic because these type of women are a strong breed that the self reliant and confident man will steer clear of. Smart men quickly realize that trouble will surround this relationship from the start and end with hurt feelings on both parts. If you don't believe me just ask a single-advice giving-know it all sister what happened to her last 2 relationships??? 90% chance its the same story for all-lol! Too much mouth and not enough attention to detail. Not to get it twisted, because we all need a dose of reality from someone who is real, but somehow it just doesn't have the same kick when the advice giver doesn't have her stuff together! The funny thing about this is that I am learning about myself through the actions of others. I was asked a pensive question by a client today. They asked me if I would rather be liked or feared? I thought about it, then about my know it all comm-rads and said the following. "Neither, i would rather be respected because, if some one fears you they will turn on you once they get a chance to find something better. If you are just liked, then people will have a tendency to view you as a push over and treat you like a poot butt when they feel like it, especially when a crowd is around."
With that being said, I am glad I know people who think they know the opposite sex so well, because i want to learn to keep my view to myself. I realized the power of being supportive but tactful with others I encounter. I think man was not meant to live alone but also misery loves company!
If I could help those of which I consider, I would say "Lead by example, get your own stuff together and sin no more sucker.......
I am Ward.....

You can only help those who want to be helped....

I tried to help someone but it turned sideways. My friend is in need of a car but so emotional that they can not seem to see the helping hand that is there to help. I allowed myself to get upset for being wrongly accused. I even went as far as apologizing and was told my apology wasn't sincere. Its cool because I learned that you can only help those who want to be helped. I understand we all take false steps and do things we later wish we could take back, but at some point we all have to just face reality and realize that we need others to help us and sometimes we have to learn to say thank you and be nice...
I am Ward....

strange news this week.....................

*New Jersey health regulators have fined a tanning salon frequented by a woman who faces a child-endangerment charge after her 5-year-old daughter allegedly suffered first-degree burns in a booth, according to news reports.

*Dallas police arrested a 35-year-old naked man after he crashed his pickup truck into a mall before it opened and tried on some clothes, according to news reports.

*A 19-year-old woman fleeing Colorado's wildfires for her father's home in Oregon crashed her car on I-84 in Idaho this week, setting off a blaze that burned up about 2,000 acres.

*A young Canadian hypnotist had to call his mentor for emergency intervention when he was unable to get a group of high school girls in Quebec to snap out a trance at the end of his show, the CBC reports.

One of the girls at Collège du Sacré-Coeur was reportedly left hypnotized for five hours until help arrived, the CBC says.

*Illinois – Police say a 2-foot-long ball python slithered its way into an Illinois apartment and wrapped itself around the foot of a sleeping 1-year-old boy and bit him on his left foot.

*San antonio, Texas – Twenty years after he claims to have been bullied in high school, a man allegedly threatened vengeance on his classmates on his high school reunion’s Facebook page, officials said.

*MOLINO, Florida – (WALA) – A Molino man tried to remove a rattlesnake from his yard, but shot himself instead.

*Linda Chase of Jackson, MI lived with Charles Ziglar for ten years. One day Charles passed away in the house from natural causes. Linda kept him in his chair after he died and watched NASCAR races on television with him and talked to him. She continued to keep his body clean and dressed.

I am Ward....

8 things I have issues with.....

*why do people on the highway have to stop and look at every car on the side of the road?
*why do Cops always pull you over and ask us do we know why they pulled us over?????
*when did the rainbow change from a promise from God to representing Gay Pride?
*How come people put all they business on Facebook?
*why do some people insist on taking their car to the dealer for repairs....you better take some Vaseline with you.....
*Why do we hurt the ones we love the most and respect those who could careless about u
*have you ever noticed that kids wants cell phones, name brand clothes and money but have a fit when you ask them to clean up the house or cut the grass?
*Why do Americans have this fascination with having green grass? Just let it die and spray paint it Green!
*Why do employers keep the job so cold, but complain about paying employees gas mileage?
*Am I the only person who notices the customer service sucks at black restaurants.
*why do some people get married and find love and others stay single for life but somehow image they are relationship experts??

I am ward....

Solution for those who want a one on one relationship

Seldom do people ever stop and say "we have been dating for a while now and its time we define the rules. We are now dating, you are my man and I am your woman (or vice versa)neither of us can relationships or spend time with others anymore. If we do then we are trying to sabotage our relationship and this means we are over. If no issues occur then we are dating to get married."
If these simple steps are omitted, then accept this one simple fact.....
The 1st time you are a victim (I feel sorry for you) and the rest of the future times, you are a volunteer....
I am Ward....

How is it that every body knows what someone else should do, but not a dang thang about they own life!

I have often heard that those who can do something well that they actually do it. Those who cant do things well learn to teach it instead ie basketball coaches.Well recently I have noticed a lot of people have relationship advice (ummm for other people) but conveniently gloss over their own situations. I ain't trippin on it because I am sure I do it-lol!
I guess personally, I just don't try not to give advice and do more listening and nodding my head. I realized at the end of the day we are all responsible for our own actions and decisions regardless of others good intentions.
Situation #1.
Girl meets guy and says she wants to marry him after a short period of dating. He dude is in agreement and they plan their futures. The families are livid because they don't agree. Who is right? Who is wrong? What should they do? I know the answer, they couple should do what they want because they are grown and able to make their or choice. If it don't work, then they learned something but it was their choice!
Situation #2.
Man wants to purchase a new car. He has great credit but doesn't make that much $. He can get his dream car with monthly payments of $1,000 per month, but only brings home $2000 per month. Everyone says "don't do it" what should he do? Again, his choice and his lesson to confirm or learn....ya feels me?
Situation #3
Lady decides she wants to dress like it's 1973. Others are laughing every time she walks by. Is she wrong for wearing clothes that a blind person would be envious of? On this one- I agree that a certain measure of professionalism must be considered at the work place, but what I do find equally disturbing, is when others in the work place talk about the co-worker behind her back. I feel if you don't have anything good to say about the person, then don't say nothing!
All the scenarios above have one common theme. Nobody is perfect and we all have different perspectives on life. But if we are all unaware we may become a bigger problem them we ever imagined.

I am Ward....