The long arm of the Law.....

Indiana questionable laws.....
One may not sniff glue.
Baths may not be taken between the months of October and March. (state law)
A man over the age of 18 may be arrested for statutory rape if the passenger in his car is not wearing her socks and shoes, and is under the age of 17.
It is against the law to pass a horse on the street.
It is illegal for a liquor store to sell cold soft drinks.
Liquor stores may not sell milk.
Check forgery can be punished with public flogging up to 100 stripes.
Pedestrians crossing the highway at night are prohibited from wearing tail lights. (Darn...there goes the latest fall season...)
No one may catch a fish with his bare hands.
"Spiteful Gossip" and "talking behind a person's back" are illegal.
All males 18 to 50 years old must work six days a year on public roads.
Mustaches are illegal if the bearer has a tendency to habitually kiss other humans.
Hotel sheets must be exactly 99 inches long and 81 inches wide.
The value of Pi is 3.2, and not 3.1415. (Eventually, I'm gonna come across a law outlawing gravity...)
It is illegal for barbers to threaten to cut off kid's ears.
No one may throw an old computer across the street at their neighbor.

I am Ward (and I live in INDIANA 4 Now)

five times 2!!!!!

10 Truths Black And Hispanic People Know, But White People Won't Admit:

1. Elvis is dead.
2. Jesus was not white.
3. Rap music is here to stay.
4. Kissing your pet is not cute or clean(Charles/Nicole).
5. Skinny does not equal sexy.
6. Thomas Jefferson had black children.
7. A 5-year-child is too big for a stroller.
8. N'Sync will never hold a candle to the Jackson 5.
9. An occasional butt-whooping helps a child stay in line and strongly suggested!
10. Having your children curse you out in public is not normal or cool.


10 Truths White And Black People Know, But Hispanic People Won't Admit:

1. Hickeys are not attractive.
2. Chicken is food, not a roommate.
3. Jesus is not a name for your son.
4. Men don't wear hair nets.
5. Maria is a name but not for every other daughter.
6. "Jump out and run" is not a substitute for car insurance.
7. 10 people to a car is considered too many.
8. Buttoning just the top button of your shirt is a bad fashion statement.
9. Mami and Papi can't possibly be the nickname of every person in your family.
10. Dressing your daughter in a wedding dress and soccer shoes is a mistake!


10 Truths White And Hispanic People Know, But Black People Won't Admit:

1. O.J. did it(Ouch)
2. Tupac is dead.
3. Teeth should not be decorated.
4. Weddings should start on time.
5. Your pastor doesn't know everything.
6. Jesse Jackson or Al Sharpton will never be president.
7. Red is not a Kool-aid flavor, it's a color.
8. Worshiping God does not require expensive clothes.
9. Crown Royal bags are meant to be thrown away.
10. Your rims and sound system should not be worth more than your car.

I am Ward

21 things otherz should know about African American Folk......

*Let's just get this out of the way right now. Yes, black people wash their hair. Do I hear you ask how often? As often as any other race: every day for some, twice a week for others, once a month for others. Get the picture? Great. Let's consider the matter buried then.

*Criminals scare us, too. We don't feel comforted by the fact that someone who's the same race as us is robbing us. Crime is crime suckers.

*"You speak so well" is something you say to a two-year-old who's just learned how to talk. No matter how well you mean it, stay away from that phrase

*If you have to say: "My black friend Lucy", then you have a problem. We will automatically put you in the same box as closet racists.

*Calling black women "sisi, sister or girlfriend" doesn't make you down with the people - it makes you sound patronizing.

*None of us represent the entire black race, so blanketed enquiries about why black people do this or that won't get you anywhere. We're individuals first before we are black.

*We can swim. Oh come, don't act like you weren't thinking about it. Some of us can even scuba dive and snorkel (but not me)

*We do like Chicken (especially Popeye's)but we ain't the only people to eat it!

*I am Ward....

Must we alwayz agree to be in LoVE?

Is it true that opposites attract each other and divorce lawyers? Do we want our mates to think that what we say is how it has got to be? Do we just need to be right all the time? They say pick your battles, I say just take the "Hi" road and let the other person be right in their mind and you be right in yours and keep it moving. At times, emotions get the best of all of us and we sometimes say things that we should not have, do things we regret and make moves that can cause pain to ourselves or others for years to come!

If we know our cars and bodies require proper maintenance to perform at peak levels, why should we expect any less from our personality? Too often we are not capable of bringing our full self to the table. You deserve to live your life at 100 percent so stop stressing over mistakes and own them like you got receipt for them because we won't always make the right choice, but as long as we are still alive and have time to get it right the next time, then do it.

Wardy says that the rear view mirror in your car is smaller than your windshield because what is behind you is not the way your heading. Your future is bigger than your past. Stop focusing on what is behind you and look ahead suckers.
I am warD.....

Hollywood is Prejudice against non whites.......(sure I could have said blacks but this sounds better)

I have a newfound respect for George Lucas. I love Star Wars. I envy the life of Indiana Jones. These are the stories that have mass appeal to large numbers of movie and bootlegg watchers.

My newfound respect for George has stemmed from his willingness to do something the majority of Hollywood is completely against—he made a film consisting of an entirely black cast steeped in one of the most prominent African American stories, The Tuskegee Airmen. Point: Go see the film Red Tails (Its surprisingly good).

The Tuskegee airmen were the first African American combat pilots in the United States Army. They fought in World War II. The airmen were met with racial discrimination and hatred from the army and citizens of The United States. Still, they served their country like G'z and became known as one of the best groups ever to emerge from the US Army Air Corps.

Now, why is George Lucas’ movie important? Simple. Absolutely no one wanted to make it. Forget story structure, production costs, or the magnitude of the film’s scope. It is an African American movie that does not feature melodrama, gang violence or hood portrayals. Hollywood is having none of that. If the story does not revolve around what I previously stated, sports, or a white person helping a poorly educated (often idiotic) black person (see The Blind Side, Finding Forrester, etc.), it will not be made. The Help is not an exception. The story may have African Americans, but it dwelled on the overwhelmingly privileged lives of southern whites.And why does all these black movies have to live in the past? You mean blacks ain't did nothing positive recently????

There are bright spots. Spike Lee’s movies can bring a non-black crowd. Tyler Perry movies have been notably profitable, but are seriously dissected by mainstream critics.

So what’s the problem? Hollywood does not think black sells (unless you are Will Smith, maybe Denzel Washington or Samuel “I Play Myself in Every Movie I Make” Jackson). A cast for a mainstream, high budget movie will never be predominately black (or predominately minority for that matter). Hollywood will not even allow a white woman to be a black man’s love interest, unless it specifically deals with race issues (see O, a modern conception of Othello). In Will Smith’s movie Hitch, Nicole Kidman was considered for the part of Will Smith’s love interest, but executives opted for a Latino lead role in fear their white audience may not approve of such interracial sexy. The opposite is untrue. A white man can bugger up a black woman on screen all he wants (see Monster’s Ball or Star Trek).

Hollywood executives said no, watching the screening of Red Tails. One executive didn’t even show up. I could understand such individuals ignoring Spike Lee or Tyler Perry in this endeavor, but to know someone of George Lucas’ clout could be ignored tells us Hollywood retains a circle jerk of high-powered money-rollers who still have a stamp of prejudice on the money they stuff up their rear-end.

All I am saying is that ""black people aren't waiting for Hollywood to come save us, we waiting on ourselves to quit being distracted by all the ploys of the invisible ruler of the joint". Ya feelz me.

Final note, when I was chilling at this flick, I was suprised at how many of my white brothers I saw there 2. I am thinking this movie is gonna make some major money......

I am ward.....

Time and Extra emotions......

Why is it that we hurt the ones we love? Why do we give and take bad advice from people (the people at the barber shops, our single friends with all the dating advice, the psychic network-lol) Do we just take liberties because we know they love us or need or money? I can't tell you how many times I have heard people say," I wish I had told such and such how much I love them or I wish I more time to spend my love one i lost in sleep to death. Of course no 1 can do everything we have on our proverbial bucket list but we can try 2 manifest qualities in our daily lives to help ease the pain of the unforeseen circumstances that befall us all! Do we ever try working on life changing qualities like these.....Love-Joy-Peace-long-suffering-kindness-goodness-faith-mildness-and self control? I am taking each one step by step because I am frustrated with the craziness of the cirle of life sometimes.
I wrote this blog because I was thinking how some things I went through in my life, with friends, families and acquaintances and realized this....Time is a natural resource like "fuel". What we have plenty of we we all cool with that and take it stria-8ht for granted! Don't act like its just me. When that fuel becomes scarce we search for that extra gallon regardless of cost---Wouldn't you give anything for another gallon of time with some loved ones who are gone? Time is a precious gift! Every second, every minute, everyday, use it wisely suckers! None of us can afford to pay the cost of losing time. I also think that checking our emotions will play a major role in this as well.
I know I have written it many times before, but my daughters have helped me realize that treating others with love and respect is so much more effective that being harsh, unloving or insensitive to others. Once words are spoken, it is very hard to get them back- ya feel me? Time and Extra emotions can sometimes be our friend-na-mies. Wardy advises, when someone is nice to us please accept it for what it is. When we have a chance to say I love you, take it! If we make a mistake- then make things right ASAP, with words of sorry-actions of repentence and a plan of attack to prevent that error again. I know I made my share of mistakes and more than likely will make 1 or 2 more in my life time (unlikely!)Nevertheless in the words of Sam Cooke...."Change gone come"
I am Ward......

Wardz guide 4 kissing - dummies and all the rest....

Now this may be easy for some and harder for others, but Wardy is gonna make this thing make sense for the rookie in you. Kissing is the most important part of the date. You know if you will continue to see this person, if yall gonna freak sooner or later-lol! I remember kissing this girl in college and she acted like a fish sucking water. I was like “Yuck” and I immediately stopped and never kissed her again. Trust ya boi when I say she was stuck deep in the friend zone! Anywho, here is Wardy’s tips to getting some lipp!

1.Make sure your breath is minty fresh and clean. I think this point is clear!

Approach the kiss with confidence. Don’t ask sucka, you gotta take charge! How you think Jay z got Beyonce????

Lean in and turn your head slightly. Leaning in signals that you want to kiss the person, and turning your head prevents crushing your nose against the other person’s.

Start slowly. Don’t try to thrust your tongue in your partner’s mouth right away. Simply press your lips against theirs and let it happen naturally.

Open your lips slightly. Once the kiss is accepted, try opening your lips slightly and softly. Nobody like hard lips or pecks!!!

Consider the French Kiss. As the kiss progresses, you may want to try French kissing-Inbox me for instructions on how to French Kiss.

Keep your arms busy. You seldom, maybe never, see a great kiss in which the participants just let their arms dangle at their sides. At the very least, embrace your partner and gently pull him or her to you! Not too tight either, this is suppose to be enjoyable.

Try kissing in a comfortable position and romantic area. This will make the kiss last longer and lead to other thangs…..wink wink!

Now the master never gives all the advice on how to, but you will be fine. (maybe)

I am Ward yall……

I asked some people is it o.k. to date your friends EX????

Personally I think if you are not with them, it must be for a reason. If you are not selfish it shouldn't matter who your "EX" is dating. Perhaps its just Taboo in society now a dayz but hey.....it happens. My home boy married my ex and did ask my permission. I was cool with it and even visit them when I go to their town. Anywho here is some responses from some randoms eye asked.......

*after a certain amount of time goes by and even than you need to talk it over with your pal

*NO! even if you ask them and they say it's okay, it's totally not. Wait at least five years after the breakup.

*no its not okay with you if ots not okay with your friend.rem your friendship with your friend is not worth breaking just because of his ex.dont you know the best friends rule."if i date this guy as my friend you are not suposed to date him till his or your pals death"
respect your pals and love them they are worth more than diamonds.

*It depends on if you value your friendship!

*sure.. as long as u tell ur friend 1st....

*Don't be a douche. Ask.

*Yes. Yes, of course you can date the ex-partners of your friends. Of course you can. The question should really be, is it possible to keep your friend in the process.

I am ward.......

What in the facebook is going on N here??

Heard on the radio this morning that a 'new study' shows the #1cause of relationship problems now is...drum roll please...FACEBOOK.

I don't get it.

I have Facebook page, but I'm hardly ever on it, don't post much, mainly look to see what's happening with everyone else. But I hear now that grown folk are acting like kids. Ya know putting they business on BLAST and disrespecting each other like that. One lady was talking about how she cussed her kid out over some choices he made. One lady told her dude she was pregnant by his best friend. What is the Facebook world coming to. I can't tell you how many hook up with Ex's have taken place. I am sure Mark Zukker didn't start Facebook for this to happen.

I think Facebook is the Walmart of the internet because My Space is dead and gone. Anywho, I am just trying to figure out what makes people take their 15 minutes of fame and embarrass they families.....

I am Ward....

Why isn't heaven filled with clutter?

They say you can train a child from infancy and when he grows old he won't turn away. I ask what if you never taught the child or what if your non spoken word was garbarge so to speak. I am what one may consider a neat freak in today's standards. I think if you use something, clean it, put it back and keep it moving. That is not to say you have to always have a show model home, but show some effort in showing that you are a responsible person who is an adult! Seems simple enough to me, but so many times I see and hear of people who just don't get the message that- cleanliness is close to well......you get me point and if you don't, by all means suckers read on!
I guess its the New ODD couple, because I was recently asked how do you live with someone who does not believe in the power of pine-sol? Perhaps its a college roommate, a spouse who is lacking, or maybe its just "U" and you don't realize you are the solution to the problem. I sometimes wish others could see the people we are when we are not in the public's eye. I am sure our views might change on how we view them-lol. Would we really eat their food at the pot luck, would we continue to trust them with our belongings? Would we even visit?
Now to answer that aforementioned question, here is some Wardy adivce.


1

Set boundaries and arrange to make certain areas of the house off-limits to the slob. You can set up places, such as your own room, or a bathroom that you can keep as clean as you like without having it constantly messed up by the other person.
2

Stop picking up after your slob. Once he/she runs out of clean clothes or has no room to park the car in the junk-filled garage, your slob may decide to clean up after all. As long as he has you to keep things in order, there is no incentive to change.
3

Tell yourself that at least you are not living with a neat freak that is constantly cleaning and moving stuff around. She/he can be just as annoying as a slob.
4

Try embarrassing your big fat slob when you go out. Point out when other people stare or invite some people over unexpectedly and look at their reactions!
5

Accept your fate and decide what you can live with and what you can't. Choose your battles and do the cleaning that bothers you the most. Realize that you can't always make other people change, but you do have control over your own reactions.

At the end of the day, "we are what we do"
I am Ward......

No matter how pretty she is....some dude is tire of putting up with her ish!!!!

Have you ever read that Scripture at Genesis 3:16? Let me help you out and remind you of what it says: "To the woman he said, I shall greatly increase the pain of your pregnancy; In birth pangs you will bring fourth children, and your craving will be for your husband and he will dominate you. Yeah them thurr is some power words. Of course God didn't imply that the man has the right treat the woman as inferior but he would be the head.
So I thought about how things are today in 2012. Many couples are in turmoil because the roles have changed quite a bit with women earning more money then men, men cooking and taking care of the kids more and couples not opting to get married at all. With that being said, the ride or die chick has a new perspective on the modern relationship. She may feel like this.....She has given the man her mind, body,time and may have in moved in with you or should I say you moved in with her.She share bills with you, wash the mans dirty under rooz, had your 3 bad kids and considered spending the rest of her good years with you, and then the man does something so unthinkable.....he cheats on you!!!!!! Why would he? How could he? Is he a new fool? Did he slip-Tripp and bump his head? HUMMMM, good questions to ponder and I can quickly answer them, but I don't want to come off as condoning thangs that could lead to a whole new other blog....
I agree that some women are soliders and do get done very wrong. I aplogize on behalf of all the men who have taken false steps. Now on to the flip side of this coin. I have spoken to a great deal of women and one thing I find that they all have in common is they all "LIE". I don't care how you spin it. An untruth is just that.....a lie. How many times have you been watching Maury and hear "You are not the father"? I know guys lie also (that Klear) but women lie them big lies, because they claim they love us-so its necessary. Yeah right!
Really, if this new modern woman wants a good relationship why not do the things it takes to get and keep a good brother!
We all know sex sells, but how many men marry the woman with all her goodies on constant display, or the woman who can cuss along side the best of the construction workers. I can't leave out sister super Christian, ya know the woman who can (mis)quote all the bible verses and tell you what you should being doing while she does the complete opposite. Check Facebook on any given day and see what I am talking about-lol! An honorable mention is the woman who has the ability to challenge her dude and always has to have the last word (MS. Tit 4 Tat).
Yeah a woman can love a man good but it quickly becomes bad when she is hurt. Women tend to take pain better than us men folk do, but yall sure as heck to let your hurt consume your world. You question why you ever dated this man, how he is the worst thing since the spoon or how your mother was right about him. Then you turn around and forgive him, but the other chicken heads you ratted him out to seem to never forget the pain he caused (((((YALL))))).....
I am gonna sum it up like this. If you want a good relationship with yo man...then know your self 1st. Know if its you being defensive (thinking his statements have double meaning) or are you being emotional or just tripping because you feel your entitled cuz all you do for him. Talk to the man at a time when its relaxing about your concerns, like over a nice dinner rather then during the final 5 minutes of the play offs! Our teams need our full attention darn it! Let your actions speak louder than your mouth. Finally, tell him what you want, how you want it and what actions you will employ if he does not comply.
Guys are not as complex as women. Tell us the rules and we can follow or decide that you ain't worth it. But being wishy washy work in progress never works. Love you today, hate you tomorrow. Oh well I got a head ache thinking about how crazy women are. I know tons of yall and still cant figure you out.
Men just pick out the least craziest women you can find and close your eyes and pray cuz its gonna be a bumpy ride.....
I am Ward..