Don't act like its just me, because we all been there before. I am talking about arguing in silence, critical of your mate, being defensive when its uncalled for, stonewalling or my favorite ((having selective recall for all of ur relationships bad experiences)). Why the freak do couples always have to keep score in the so called name of love. I have heard folk say, "he hits me because he loves me or she wants me to have no interaction with other females because she thinks I may cheat on her.
Normally, I would say this type of behavior is ludicrous to say the least, but since I am looking at things from a new light now a daze, I am gonna entertain this topic for a few paragraphs because its late at night and I am basically bored....so here it goes.
I seriously think that love 1 oh 1 should be taught as a regular class in high school be4 any one can graduate. I use to try to tell a work in progress that men and women speak a totally different language. Not being better or worse than the other, just different. With that being said, It never seizes to amaze me how often times, couples say I love you with their words and show I hate you with their actions. I heard the other day that one of the worst things a woman can do is to run to her mama and talk about her dude and they relationship, yet that is what happens everyday in somebody's situation. Dudes ain't no better, we have this great desire to flirt with any thing (o.k. its 2011, let me correct that)any woman with a skirt on.
The real question is why can't we get along with the opposite sex for extended periods of time? I know the simple answer but that is too easy, so let us take the long route. Imagine 4 a moment what it is like when the single happy dude lays his eyes on the woman of his dreams. He wants to whoo her and make her his love child and spoil her with gifts and love 4 ever. How quickly things change after the famous 6 month front is over and the man finds out that the woman isn't really that special she just wants to be treated that way. She talks crazy 2 him when ever she wants to, hits him if she feels the urge, and belittle him when ever she gets the opportunity. Perhaps she does this because the man no longer pursues her with the same intensity, no longer sending flowers for no reason, no longer talking for hours about her day and not feeding her need to hear how pretty and special she is. He no longer values her as a special jewel and she will make him pay for these critical mistakes.
In reality, we are all just dust off the ground and have done nothing special nor perfect in anyway. What we should learn to do is.... get some active listening skills developed rather quickly and then go on www.ebay.com and purchase a back bone and man up and realize that we all hurt people and say and do things that are stupid at times. It would also behoov us to stop crying about nothing and ask the all important question of "what do we need to do to get past this problem we are experiencing? This is the start of healing and the end of keeping score with the tit 4 tat game that is played so well by couples.
Face it suckers, if you find love once you did a good thing, but to find love a 2nd time is darn near a feat of unbelievability (yes its a real word). So love the one your with and love your self enough to realize that love moves you to make changes 4 the better and be forgiving because love is kind and long suffering. Its not about who is right or wrong rather about knowing your position on the team of love and playing it to the best of your ability.
I am Ward.....
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